Crazy not a Fool

Life has its own characteristics, like water, electricity, or fire. One characterizes of life is that life loves to make a fool out of people. For example. If you brag that you have never gotten a speeding ticket in your entire life, you’ll get pulled over the next day.

One thing that always bothered me was that I had a habit of losing things, and one time I needed a flashlight because we had a power outage, and when I looked for the flashlight it wasn’t where I thought I had left it.

Finally, I went to the hardware store and bought a new one. When I got home my girlfriend Stacey said that she found the flashlight while I was gone.

Now this was really common, in fact, in so common that I discovered it to be a pattern. And it dawned on me, that I would always find the lost item only after I went out and replaced it with a new one.

Stacey said, “Now you can take that flashlight back and get a refund.”

“No, I have a better idea, I said, a then I took the old flashlight went outside and smashed it against the concrete driveway, and shattering the case into a several pieces, and sending the large “D” batteries down the driveway.

“Why did you do that, Stacey asked, looking at me like I was crazy.”

“Because I’m not going to let life make a fool out of me, I said.”

“What are you talking about, she asked.”

“You magically found the flashlight only after I went out a

bought a new one, but if I had not gone out to buy a new one, we would still be here looking for the old one together, I said.”

“I don’t believe that, she disagreed.”

“Well it’s true, this is not even the of the first time its happened, you just don’t see the pattern, -life cheats, I said.”

“Your just mad because I found the flashlight before you left for the store, she said.”

“And that’s the only reason you found it, I said, Because I left, otherwise we would still be looking for it together.

“That’s crazy, she said.”

“I don’t have a problem with crazy, but I’m am not going to let life make a fool out of me, because I’m not a fool.

Pride before the fall.

This is not the first time that something like this has happened to me, and the pattern is always the same, life just waiting for its opportunity to embarrass me.

I owned this car and it started making horrible noises everywhere I went, and it was really embarrassing, people would stare. Finally, I took it to a mechanic, but that one time I did the car wasn’t making any noises for him, it suddenly became quiet as a church mouse.

Long story short, the mechanic found out what the problem, was but it several visits, and I had the same problem with the car each time. After the last fix, I immediately parked the car in front of my lawn and put a “for-sale” sign, in front of the window. I borrowed my mom’s car, but never drove that one again.

I had to sell it. I was never going to let “life” use that car as a vehicle for my embarrassment. If the car never sold then I would have given it away, because even in a no win situation, I was going to declare a draw.

On another car, I replaced the battery, alternator, carburetor, radiator, muffler with exhaust pipes, and gave it a tune up only to have the engine throw a rod the next day.

Never again.

Back to the flashlight, I smashed the flashlight to tell life, or fate, or God, “Hey, you’re not going to make a fool out of me, there a saying that Life’s a stage, well if so I am not playing to play the fool.


I’m make a fool of life by exposing “life” for what it is, a cheating cock sucker, piece of shit, that doesn’t fight fair, and no one should have to suffer the public humiliation life gives them for no reason..

This story is my testament, you are my witness.

Life isn’t fair, my mom told me when I was five years old.

You can dismiss my assumption as ridiculous, because I can’t prove it, so it’s outcome is not based on logic, however, you cannot dismiss my observation as insanity either, because you have all been a victim of this yourself.

“Everybody Plays the Fool” legendary song, written by J.R. Bailey, Rudy Clark and Ken Williams.


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